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LHH Power Rankings: Don't Read This Article

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Seriously. Don't. You'll only get depressed.

This guy just helped beat us.
This guy just helped beat us.
Eric Hartline-USA TODAY Sports

You clicked anyway? Are you really sure you want to do this? Hasn't your friend sent you a video of his or her household pet doing something hilarious that you could watch a few times instead?

Fine, don't say I didn't warn you...

The Isles have been terribad lately. They somehow managed to compile a pretty good record on the recent long road trip anyway, but now the results are matching the product. The even-more-recent but shorter road trip will attest to that.

Publications, sharpen your knives!

Weekly Roundup of Opinion Polls

Site Updated New Ranking Prior Ranking Comments
CBS 3/22/2016 14 9 The Isles are in a big-time slump as the absence of Jaroslav Halak looms large in the coming weeks. New York has lost six of seven games and has slipped into wild-card position. If the Islanders aren't careful, they could slide right out of the playoffs.
ESPN 3/21/2016 14 9 On Saturday, the Islanders dropped their third consecutive game; they are 1-3-2 in their past six. Thomas Greiss made 33 saves in a 3-0 loss to the Stars. The Islanders have scored three goals during their three-game slide.
TSN 3/16/2016 7 10 It’s been a bit of a grind, 1-1-2, since Jaroslav Halak suffered a groin injury that is forcing Thomas Greiss to handle a starter’s workload. He’s already played a career-high 32 games, but also has a career-best .928 save percentage this season.
THN 3/16/2016 11 3 Isles in the "Mushy Middle" section. "Keeping Kyle Okposo has worked for the Islanders so far as he has four goals and nine points in eight games to lead New York post-deadline"
SI 3/22/2016 17 9 Two weeks ago, the Isles were sitting pretty in the standings. Now? Four straight losses have left them clinging to a wild-card berth, with just three points separating them from ninth-place Philadelphia, the team that whipped them, 4–1, on Monday night. New York has scored only 11 goals its past seven games. Time for captain John Tavares (goal-less in five) to step up.
Average 12.6 8 You're still here? Don't you have a few Candy Crush lives left to play?

I don't think anyone here blames the above sites for coming down hard on a slumping team that ought to be rounding into playoff form. TSN and THN both update their power rankings later today. Shame we can't let them in on the fun, but I have a finite amount of time to finish writing about this turd-tastic run of play. Speaking of things that drop...

LHH Power Rankings

Games through 3/22/16. Every. Stinkin'. One. Of. Them.

(6) (4) (3) (2) (0)
Reg OT OT Reg LHH LHH
GP W W SO L L Pts Rating
1 Washington Capitals 72 42 6 5 4 15 299 124.3
2 Dallas Stars 74 36 6 4 7 21 266 114.8
3 Los Angeles Kings 73 31 11 4 3 24 248 110.6
4 San Jose Sharks 73 33 5 6 3 26 242 109.3
5 St. Louis Blues 74 31 7 9 5 22 251 109.3
6 Chicago Blackhawks 74 32 9 3 5 25 247 109.2
7 New York Rangers 73 34 4 4 6 25 244 108.7
8 Pittsburgh Penguins 72 33 4 7 4 24 243 107.6
9 Florida Panthers 73 32 1 10 6 24 238 106.8
10 New York Islanders 71 31 4 8 4 24 234 106.6
11 Anaheim Ducks 72 34 3 7 5 23 247 106.5
12 Tampa Bay Lightning 73 32 7 6 2 26 242 105.8
13 Nashville Predators 73 33 1 4 12 23 238 103.7
14 Philadelphia Flyers 72 24 9 10 5 24 220 102.7
15 Boston Bruins 73 30 5 4 7 27 226 102.6
16 Colorado Avalanche 73 32 2 4 4 31 220 101.5
17 Minnesota Wild 74 31 1 5 9 28 223 99.7
18 Detroit Red Wings 73 25 9 7 6 26 219 99.7
19 New Jersey Devils 73 24 9 8 1 31 206 96.8
20 Carolina Hurricanes 73 22 8 5 10 28 199 93.9
21 Montreal Canadiens 74 26 3 8 3 34 198 92.3
22 Buffalo Sabres 74 25 3 8 4 34 194 91.6
23 Ottawa Senators 74 22 6 12 2 32 196 91.0
24 Winnipeg Jets 73 26 2 5 3 37 185 90.1
25 Arizona Coyotes 73 26 5 2 6 34 194 89.1
26 Columbus Blue Jackets 73 23 1 10 4 35 180 88.4
27 Calgary Flames 73 20 9 5 3 36 177 86.8
28 Toronto Maple Leafs 72 19 1 12 5 35 164 85.5
29 Vancouver Canucks 72 19 4 7 9 33 169 84.9
30 Edmonton Oilers 76 19 7 5 5 40 167 80.3

You might ask, "How the hell can they still be a top 10 team?!" and I want to agree with you, but consider two things:

1) This table is generated with no regard to recent run of play. The first game of the year weighs just as much as the last. Taken as a whole, this team has had a pretty good year thus far. It just doesn't feel that way right now.

2) They did drop five positions, which is pretty impressive in a one-week span. Those last few games really managed to drag their 71 game average down that much.

Told you not to read. Now go watch an appropriate palate cleanser.