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Zeitgeist: Islanders sale drags on for another excruciating hour

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Source: "What the hell is taking so long?"

Whenever you guys are ready
Whenever you guys are ready

The sale period for the New York Islanders has been extended for another hour, prolonging an already interminable process and keeping the club trapped in limbo.

A deal is not expected to be finalized soon and could painfully continue into tomorrow, according to an exasperated source close to the team under condition of anonymity.

"It's gone on forever and needs to get done already," said the source. "We're all waiting for a new owner to come in get to work. It should have happened yesterday. What the hell is taking so long?"

In late March, Islanders owner Charles Wang confirmed a report that he would listen to offers for his team, and is seeking around $300 million for a full sale. Several suitors stepped forward in the subsequent days, but none have signed on the dotted line just yet and no one knows what the hold-up is.

"Someone needs to buy the Islanders ASAP. Let's go, let's go," said the source, who is not one of the prospective buyers. "It's gone on way too long. A guy with a lot of dough needs to step up and just buy the damn team!"

Philadelphia lawyer and hedge fund manager Andrew Barroway emerged as an early ownership candidate shortly after the announcement. Barroway, who previously kicked the tires on buying the New Jersey Devils last season before floating them a $30 million loan, is reportedly interested in purchasing a 75% stake in the Islanders.

"[Andrew] Barroway, Anne Hathaway, Joey Galloway, whoever it is, just buy them already," - anonymous source on the tortuously long sale of the New York Islanders

But Barroway hasn't finalized anything -- the latest report had Barroway seeking to raise another $30 to $50 million -- while Islanders fans wait desperately for news of the sale to him or anybody.

"Can't he just get the money?" the source said. "Barroway, Anne Hathaway, Joey Galloway, whoever it is, just buy them already. Please!"

The payroll for the Islanders has been among the NHL's lowest for several seasons as the team rebuilt its roster through the draft. They will leave Nassau Coliseum, their home since 1972, for Brooklyn's Barclays Center beginning in the 2015-16 NHL season, and fans are hoping that an infusion of cash and hope from a long-awaited new owner will finally make the struggling, threadbare team a contender.

"Charles Wang, ever the silent type, does not tip hands or name names," said longtime New York Post hockey writer Larry Brooks. "He is hiding these negotiations the way he no doubt hides hockey related revenue from the NHLPA, and will only reveal his co-conspirator when they are backed into a corner like bank robbers trapped by a constable."

The Islanders did not respond to multiple e-mail inquires for this story because that's just so like them.

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This article, unlike the unceasing march of time, is a fabrication.