Have a Super Super Bowl Pre-Game Show with the Islanders

The Super Bowl, of course, is more than just a single football game. There has already been days of analysis of every player, coach and inch of Superdome turf that could affect the outcome of the game. And on Sunday, there will be official pre-game festivities on three different channels starting at 8:00 am, despite a 6:30 pm kick off. That's 14 hours of gasbags bloviating about events that probably won't actually happen.

But why watch talking when you can watch hockey?

Intrepid viewers can skip all that worthless hot air and make their own pre-game show with afternoon hockey games. In particular for followers of the New York Islanders, their 3:00 pm home game against the New Jersey Devils should dovetail nicely into a full day of sports (provided you can forget about the fact that both the Jets' and Giants' seasons went up in flames).

So call your friends, tell them to be at your place at 3 for the real big game of the day. And here are some delicious recipes from us to keep everyone fed and happy.

GRILLED GAUCA-MOULSON

3 Haas Avocados

1 Lime

1/2 teaspoon Chili Powder

1/2 teaspoon Cumin

1/2 teaspoon Cayenne

Kosher Salt (to taste)

Heat a stove top grill or grill pan over medium heat. Split the avocados by...here, just watch this, but don't scoop them yet. Spray the halved and pitted avocados with non-stick spray and place flesh side down on the hot grill for about two minutes or until a char appears on the avocado. Take them off the grill and let cool until you can handle them. Scoop out the flesh into a bowl.

Cut the lime in half and squeeze the juice onto the avocado (if the lime is a little dry, you may need a second one). Toss to coat all of the halves. With a potato masher, mash the avocado to your desired consistency. Gently fold in the spices, which can be altered to fit your tastes (want more heat, bump up the cayenne. More smoky body, more cumin). Add salt as desired.

If making ahead of time, keep in the fridge in a covered container. Place a piece of plastic wrap directly on top of the guacamole, then put the lid on it. Air will make the guacamole turn brown, so the trick is to keep things as airtight as possible, even within the container.

Serve with tortilla chips (I prefer blue corn)

ROASTED GARLIC TRAVIS HUMMUS-IC

1 Can of Chickpeas, drained but with the liquid saved

2 Tablespoons of Tahini Sauce

1 Tablespoon Lemon Juice

1 head of Garlic, plus four peeled cloves

Olive Oil

Salt to taste

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Cut the top off the head of garlic just far enough down so that the individual cloves are visible. Drizzle with a little olive oil and wrap in tin foil. Roast it the oven for 45 minutes to 1 hour or until the garlic is fragrant and easily squeezed. Remove from the oven and let cool until you can handle it. Squeeze or scoop out the soft garlic cloves into a bowl. Mash into a paste with a fork and set aside.

In a food processor, combine the chickpeas, about two tablespoons of the chickpea liquid, the lemon juice and the tahini sauce. Blend for about 30-45 seconds. Add as much of the roasted garlic as you prefer and spin once for couple of seconds. Add salt to taste.

Pour into a bowl. Place the four peeled cloves on top of the hummus. This garnish adds a little extra garlic flavor as well as acting like a big sign saying "This has garlic in it." Place in the fridge for a few hours or, if possible, overnight.

Serve with pita chips or vegetables (carrots are best)

FRANS IN A BLANKET

1 Box Frozen Pigs in a Blanket

1 Oven

Buy a box of pigs in a blanket. Prepare according to instructions on box. Leave it to the experts.

Of course, it wouldn't be a party without some hooch (FOR THOSE OF LEGAL DRINKING AGE)

LONG ISLAND HOCKEY FAN ICED TEA

1 part Vodka

1 part Tequila

1 part Rum

1 part Gin

1 part Triple Sec

1/2 part Campari Bitters (for obvious reasons)

Mix over ice and serve in one of these bad boys.

A SHOT OF JOSH BAILEY'S

1/2 oz of Bailey's Irish Cream

1/2 oz of Lemon Schnapps

I have no idea what this tastes like. Could be good, could leave a weird, uncertain impression. Much like the man it's named after.

And for dessert:

TAVARES' TOP-SHELF TRIFLE

1 box Red Velvet cake mix

2 boxes Instant White Chocolate Pudding

1 pint Heavy Cream

Confectioner's sugar

(or you can just by Cool Whip)

10-12 Peppermint Patties, chopped into quarters

You'll need both a trifle bowl and a stand mixer.

Bake the cake as per the instructions in a 13 x 9 inch pan. Prepare the pudding per the box's instructions as well.

When the cake is completely cooled, turn out onto a cutting board. Cut the cake into squares about 1 inch in size. Doesn't have to be perfect, but try to stay as uniform as you can.

Spread the cake pieces around the bottom of the bowl, leaving a little room in between. They shouldn't be packed tight, but make sure the coverage is good. Spoon in some of the pudding, enough to almost cover the cake pieces. Then repeat both steps. Two layers of cake and two layers of pudding should bring you almost to the top of the bowl.

Place the stand mixer's bowl in the freezer for a few minutes until cold. Install the bowl in the mixer, add the heavy cream and whip on medium until soft peaks form. Add as much confectioner's sugar as you desire, but don't go too sweet. The pudding and the Peppermint Patties will take care of that.

Spread the whipped cream on top of your topmost layer. Dot the top of the whipped cream with the quartered Peppermint Patties. Park in the fridge. Again, making it the night before is best.

So why listen to a bunch of washed-up ex-athletes drone on and on about some back-up nose tackle's brave fight against a hangnail when you can host an awesome party and watch the Islanders-Devils game? You'll have so much fun, you'll forget about... that other game.