As foretold in the prophecies of the Sumerians (or kicked around by Arthur Staple of Newsday for the last few days), the Islanders have once again released the ghost of Radek Martinek into the NHL following the loss of Lubomir Visnovsky to a concussion last weekend.
UPDATE: Arthur Staple reports Brian Strait has an upper body malady, so Martinek is slated to play Friday in Pittsburgh.
Even before Martinek took on the ethereal form of the undead, the stay-at-home apparition wasn't expected to produce much offense. So while he can't replace Visnovsky's power play direction or play driving, Martinek will serve as a kind and benign spirit for the Islanders to summon via seance in the event of injury, while letting the prospects remain in Bridgeport, away from the destruction he might cause.
It didn't take much to resurrect Martinek. How little? Let's say this Twinkie represents the average player salary in the NHL. If we matched it to Martinek's salary, it would be a Twinkie... one inch long with approximately 1.05 ounces of cream inside.
Martinek gets $600K for season. #Isles— Arthur Staple (@StapeNewsday) October 23, 2013
The Islanders press release says "Martinek Returns for his 12th Season," but it sure feels like he's been around since Biblical times. Last season, the Czech played 13 games with the Islanders, mostly as a bottom-pair defensive zone free-roaming vapor.
He also scored three goals that made fans say, "Hey, that's great. One last hurrah for ol' Marty. It's Milluh Time," only to see him haunting the ice again a few games later. Since the end of the playoffs, local townsfolk had heard strange noises and seen unexplainable phenomenon around the Islanders' practice facility at IceWorks, which was believed to be Martinek's poltergeist roaming the halls and wailing mournfully because he was probably injured.
A source close to the Islanders said the return of Martinek was inevitable:
Radek the Traveler. He will come in one of the pre-chosen forms. During the rectification of the Vuldrini, the traveler came as a large and moving Torg! Then, during the third reconciliation of the last of the McKetrick supplicants, they chose a new form for him: that of a giant Slor! Many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you!
OK. Important safety tip. Thanks.
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