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INTERIOR - MASSAPEQUA HIGH SCHOOL, LONG ISLAND, N.Y. - MORNING
JOEY, a looks-older-than-he-is senior, enters his homeroom on Monday morning. He is clad head-to-toe in New York Yankees gear. Yankees hat, Yankees shirt, Yankees sweats, even Yankees socks. The ensemble is topped by a Yankees jacket that's way too heavy for a warm springtime. He immediately heads for his friend TOMMY, who is seated already. Tommy looks exactly like Joey - Yankees all the way.
JOEY
Bro! What happened, bro?
TOMMY
What happened? They lost, that's what happened.
JOEY
No shit, they lost. How?
TOMMY
The King stopped bein' The King.
JOEY
Yup. Yup. But what about the other guys? Like that Mike Richards?
Where did he go?
TOMMY
I have no idea. He did nothing.
JOEY
And that other guy?
TOMMY
Who?
JOEY
The guy he plays with. What's his name? Gabbo... Gabra...
TOMMY
Gabby?
JOEY
Yeah, yeah, Gabby, Gabby. What happened to Gabby?
TOMMY
Gabby disappeared. A buncha guys did. Brust, Dupinski, Doyle, Hagman--
JOEY
--Is he the guy with the old time beard?
TOMMY
I think so.
JOEY
Only guys who showed up were Gerrati, the kid, Kreeder, and Bryan Callahan.
TOMMY
Well, Callahan always shows up.
JOEY
My dad said DaZotto was terrible.
TOMMY
He was. Everytime he was on the ice, the Devils scored.
JOEY
And, I mean, I never heard of any of those guys.
TOMMY
You musta heard of Marty Bradoor. He's, like, super old.
JOEY
Whatever. I never heard of him. Probably just some old bastard who got lucky.
TOMMY
So what did you do after the game? I texted you.
JOEY
Yeah, I went to the woods behind the train station parking lot and got
hammered, bro. Friggin' hammered. I thought I'd see you there.
TOMMY
Nah, I tried calling the FAN with a trade idea. Hey, what do you think of this:
DaZotto and a draft pick for Nick Nash - that guy who plays for Colorado?
JOEY
Is he good?
TOMMY
Yeah, he's pretty good.
JOEY
Well, if he's good they should get him. Whatever it takes. Trade whoever.
TOMMY
You know what I was thinkin' about while I was on hold? That very first game
we went to. Remember that? Long time ago. When we were kids.
JOEY
You mean that game last year?
TOMMY
Yeah, the one last year.
JOEY
That. Was. Awesome. Bro.
TOMMY
I know, right! We went with our dads, we didn't know any players,
we didn't really know what was going on but it was awesome.
They scored a ton of goals, all different ways by a lot of different guys.
There was a fight, crazy saves, a ton of shots, back and forth, all that stuff.
And it was like we discovered this friggin' great thing that was, like,
tough but fast and you could see someone do some crazy move any second.
JOEY
I remember, I remember. We dove right in.
TOMMY
We fell in love with the game.
JOEY
Totally! Totally, bro. Fell in love with the game.
TOMMY
And we became Rangers fans, right then and there. For life.
JOEY
Hell yeah. (a pause) Wait. You talking about that first game?
TOMMY
Yeah.
JOEY
The very first game you and I went to?
TOMMY
Yes, dumbass. The first Rangers game we went to.
JOEY
Bro, you're the dumbass. That was an Islanders game.
TOMMY
It was?
JOEY
Yeah! Don't you remember? They lost, like, 6-3. My dad got tickets from
his office because nobody else wanted 'em. And the security guys
let us move way down because there was a ton of empty seats.
And your dad was, like, super excited because he met some guy named...
Bill Nye or Bob Nyborg or someone that he liked when he was a kid. Then
afterwards we walked across Hempstead Turnpike and went to
Hooters. Then my dad dropped you and me off at the mall.
TOMMY
Holy shit. You're right. That was an Islanders game.
JOEY
I told you.
Tommy sits back in his chair pensively. He takes a deep breath of contemplation.
TOMMY
So, does that mean we should be Islanders fans?
JOEY
No, bro! They suck.
FIN
___
Relax, Rangers fans. Your team is damn good. Welcome back to the mountain top. We're just hoping they have some new company soon.