Lighthouse Zeitgeist

Humor, parody, fiction and other things to make us laugh from the New York Islanders and the wider world of hockey.

OCP to rebuild Isles Tavares as cyborg 'RoboJohn'

11

With their star sidelined for the remainder of the NHL season with a knee injury, the New York Islanders and megacorporation OCP say they plan to rebuild John Tavares as a half-human half-robot...

Non-Olympic Isles compete in snowball fight

16

The Islanders' team-wide parking lot snowball fight begins this week for players that were not invited to participate in their national teams at the Winter Games in Sochi. (humor)

What Twitter would say if Billy Smith played today

94

The Islanders' dynasty era netminder is a legend because of his win total and his battlin' style. But that's with 30 yeras of hindsight and history behind him. What would hockey media say if he...

Yankee Stadium Forecast: Freaking cold

43

Lighthouse Hockey's unlicensed meteorologists are predicting a cold one out there when the New York Islanders face the New York Rangers at Yankee Stadium in the Bronx on Wednesday night.

Stadium Series Safety Tips presented by Coors

16

Coors Light, the NHL's Stadium Series sponsor, has issued a handy guide for keeping warm while watching tonight's Islanders-Rangers game at Yankee Stadium. We don't want to know what would happen...

Vanek Negotiation: Isles gift winger a Greek diner

61

(humor) As an incentive to entice the high-scoring unrestricted free agent winger to stay with the club, the New York Islanders gave Thomas Vanek his own diner.

Isles Fans Hold Closed-Door Meeting

42

A disappointing and mistake-filled loss to Carolina on Saturday night caused Islanders fans everywhere to huddle up and hash out their differences in private. (satire)

Zeitgeist: Tavares is ESPN's top NHL 'Poor Guy'

23

Islanders captain John Tavares is the top hockey player on ESPN's "Poor Guy" list, a collection of great athletes on pitiable teams. (satire)

'Charles': Isles Fan's In-Air Exchange with Wang

38

On a red-eye flight back to New York, a lone Islanders fan & team owner Charles Wang engaged in a note-passing conversation in an incredible story which unfolded on Twitter but was missed by the...

Self-Destructing Isles Introduce Second Mascot

36

Losers of eight straight and sporting the NHL's worst penalty kill, half a dozen slumping forwards and inadequate goaltending, the New York Islanders have brought along a new friend to delight fans...

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