New York Islanders Acquire Goaltender Tim Thomas to Probably Not Play Goal

"Guys, take it easy. He'll be one of ours on paper some day." - Bruce Bennett

What was an on-paper scenario for bored Internet commenters last summer has become reality: The New York Islanders have acquired the empty cap hit known as Vezina-winning goalie Tim Thomas.

The New York Islanders have acquired goaltender Tim Thomas from the Boston Bruins.

I am not making this up. Neither are they:

Seriously.

But wait: Brian Compton says it's NOT about reaching the floor*

*at least not now ... but later? If they dump a salary? That's probably where the "flexibility" Garth Snow talked about comes in.

Staple says it is for a conditional second rounder either in 2014 or 2015. If that pick is going to the Bruins no matter what [edit: It's not. See below. Remain calm.], then the Islanders better send someone over to Thomas' Colorado bunker ASAP and convince him that the safety and the security of the United States of America depends on him showing up to help fellow old-timer Evgeni Nabokov handle duties in the Isles crease.

Update: Relief! Cap compliance costs you nothing:

Given that outcome is quite unlikely, however -- despite the Isles' ability to coax Nabokov and Lubomir Visnovsky to report through attrition and repeated sales calls -- this is just one more ... odd* move ... in a franchise that is known for them as much as its known for being the last NHL dynasty.

*actually, if this costs nothing, it's rather fantastic.

More to come, probably. Because you know ... Islanders hockey!

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