NHL Power Rankings, Nov. 13: Nothing to See Here... Also: Tavares, Vanek injury updates

Remember celebrations like this? Me Neither. - Al Bello

Seriously, you don't want to look at these.

Before we get to the weekly power rankings, a few team updates since this morning's bits post:

Now on to the power rankings:

Nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all. Move along. Don't pay attention to the man behind the green curtain.

Still here? Sigh! Very well, but don't say I didn't warn you. The Isles were horrid during their week-long road trip, and it shows in every way shape and form. If you're the type to slow down to see car accidents, then I've got a train wreck for you...

Weekly Round-up of Opinion Polls

I want to write this as much as you want to read it. So let's just get it over with.

Date Prior
Site Published Ranking Ranking Comments
CBS 11/11/2013 24 16 The Isles have lost four in a row by a combined 16-5 and are just 2-5-0 since acquiring Thomas Vanek. Probably not the desired results.
ESPN 11/11/2013 22 17 Bold move by GM Garth Snow to acquire Thomas Vanek but a pity Buffalo netminder Ryan Miller didn't end up in Vanek's suitcase, as the Isles can't keep the puck out of their net and have lost four in a row.
TSN 11/12/2013 25 19 Outscored 16-6 in four straight losses, the Isles are missing some key offensive contributors and could use the supporting cast to rise up in the meantime.
Fox Sports --- --- 23 Not updated this week.
Sports Illustrated 11/12/2013 25 19 It was a lost week for the Isles, who dropped four straight on the road. The 30th-ranked penalty kill was at the root of three of those losses, allowing eight goals, including four on six chances to the Caps. That unit is just giving games away.
SB Nation 11/12/2013 24 15 Well, the Islanders had Thomas Vanek. Could be back by the end of the week, but either way, things aren't going great for the Islanders, who have lost four straight.
Average 24.0 18.2 The Isles are traveling south, just not physically.

I find it amusing that TSN looks towards the missing "key" offensive players (all one of them) rather than the defense. Our own calculations don't do us any more favors:

LHH Power Rankings

Calculations as of 11/11/13 (and therefore doesn't count last night's game vs. the Preds).

W L OTL Pts PWR
1 Colorado 14 2 0 28 2354
2 St. Louis 11 2 2 24 2166
3 San Jose 10 2 5 25 2125
4 Anaheim 15 3 1 31 2023
5 Phoenix 12 4 2 26 1919
6 Chicago 12 2 4 28 1915
7 Boston 11 5 1 23 1900
8 Tampa Bay 12 5 0 24 1773
9 Minnesota 10 4 4 24 1709
10 Los Angeles 11 6 0 22 1699
11 Toronto 11 6 0 22 1582
12 Nashville 8 7 2 18 1563
13 Detroit 9 5 4 22 1541
14 Vancouver 11 7 2 24 1493
15 Dallas 8 7 2 18 1479
16 Pittsburgh 11 6 0 22 1426
17 Winnipeg 8 9 2 18 1404
18 Montreal 9 8 1 19 1306
19 Ottawa 7 6 4 18 1289
20 New Jersey 5 7 5 15 1190
21 NY Rangers 9 8 0 18 1183
22 Carolina 6 7 4 16 1118
23 Washington 9 8 1 19 1088
24 Calgary 6 9 2 14 1082
25 NY Islanders 6 9 3 15 1078
26 Columbus 6 10 0 12 860
27 Florida 3 11 4 10 798
28 Philadelphia 5 10 1 11 693
29 Edmonton 4 13 2 10 653
30 Buffalo 3 15 1 7 513

Remember when we were laughing about how many of the Metro teams were stuck in the bottom five? Most of them are out and we're almost in. I just vomited in my mouth. Just a little bit. Next...

Standings from an Alternate Universe

Atlantic W OTW OTL L PTS
Boston 10 1 1 5 33
Tampa Bay 7 5 0 5 31
Toronto 8 3 0 6 30
Detroit 8 1 4 5 30
Montreal 9 0 1 8 28
Ottawa 6 1 4 6 24
Florida 2 1 4 11 12
Buffalo 1 2 1 15 8
Metropolitan W OTW OTL L PTS
Pittsburgh 10 1 0 6 32
NY Rangers 8 1 0 8 26
Washington 5 4 1 8 24
Carolina 5 1 4 7 21
New Jersey 5 0 5 7 20
NY Islanders 4 2 3 9 19
Columbus 5 1 0 10 17
Philadelphia 5 0 1 10 16
Central W OTW OTL L PTS
Colorado 13 1 0 2 41
Chicago 10 2 4 2 38
St. Louis 9 2 2 2 33
Minnesota 9 1 4 4 33
Nashville 7 1 2 7 25
Winnipeg 5 3 2 9 23
Dallas 4 4 2 7 22
Western W OTW OTL L PTS
Anaheim 13 2 1 3 44
San Jose 9 1 5 2 34
Phoenix 8 4 2 4 34
Vancouver 6 5 2 7 30
Los Angeles 5 6 0 6 27
Calgary 5 1 2 9 19
Edmonton 2 2 2 13 12

Philly would be only a regulation win behind us. So, yeah.... You know what? I'm done here. I feel like I just ran a marathon through sewage. I'm gonna go and pluck my nosehairs to give my life some meaning again.

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