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Around SBN: The Amateur Mathematics Of Linsanity

Bits: Informal workouts; mock expansion teams filled

It's skatin' time again. [This photo is from rookie camp, not today's skates.]

Per Katie Strang's Twitter, the Islanders are skating, with the vets skating first and the young 'uns (not The Young Ones, sadly) going next. All your much-anticipated prospects (you know: Hamonic, de Haan, Nino, Mikko, Poulin) are in that second group, while Rick DiPietro is in the first and told Strang the knee's good, he's ready for a regular camp. I'm sure she'll have more at the Newsday blog later.

Meanwhile, a follow-up on some in-house/SB Nation business here: After picking our protected list for SBN's mock NHL expansion draft (and later: Pondering realignment), the GMs for "Quebec" (Globe and Mail's James Mirtle) and "Winnipeg" (Behind the Net's Gabe Desjardins) made their choices, which you can see here. Gabe further explains his rationale, with some interesting points about how the salary cap world would change expansion draft strategy.

As Gabe tells it, "We were actually going to draft 30 players each, but by the time we got into the low-20s, there was nobody left worth drafting." He selected Bruno Gervais, the only exposed Islander to be claimed. (Mock Hilbert, Sim, DiPietro, Jurcina all survived.) Looking at those teams, I see some surprising strengths (Gomez! Barrett Jackman!) as well as some very old D (Hamrlik, Foote, O'Donnell) that remind me just how bad expansion teams can be.

What say you?

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Damn!

I say if Quebec was in the east, they’d knock us out of playoff contention! Especially if they were able to draft and sign FAs and trade. As old as some of those guys are, looks like it would be a good hard working team. We should track them fantasy style.

by Keith Quinn on Sep 7, 2010 2:30 PM EDT via mobile reply actions  

they did fairly well

I may not have taken Ersberg over some of the other keepers available, though I see that Gabe wanted Biron but slept on it a little too long and was unable to pick him. Kind of surprised he didn’t take Brent Johnson of Pittsburgh at the end, either, rather than a player he says he knew nothing about. Nothing wrong with a third keeper to hedge one’s bets.

82 days into my latest contract approval process

by mikb on Sep 7, 2010 3:09 PM EDT reply actions  

I was surprised to see Johnson overlooked, too

His contract sure isn’t burdensome.

Lighthouse Hockey: Trying to reconstitute the Hogue-Turgeon-Thomas line from NHL 94.

by Dominik on Sep 7, 2010 3:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

I think Atlanta’s first year team was even worse then Ottawas.

Trevor Gillies: Giving an all new meaning to "Mustache Ride"
Contributor to Lighthouse Hockey not sure if I'm the Sniper or the Enforcer.

by Mark D on Sep 7, 2010 5:04 PM EDT reply actions  

Down Goes Brown reviews NHL 11

My favorite line:

One heavily promoted new feature sees the introduction of broken sticks, which will crack or even shatter completely at the slightest contact several times each game. In an additional attempt at realism, the same technology was also applied to each of Rick DiPietro’s body parts.

http://sports.nationalpost.com/2010/09/07/the-down-goes-brown-nhl-11-review/

Trevor Gillies: Giving an all new meaning to "Mustache Ride"
Contributor to Lighthouse Hockey not sure if I'm the Sniper or the Enforcer.

by Mark D on Sep 7, 2010 6:08 PM EDT up reply actions  

My favorite:
There seems to have been some sort of audio mix-up with EA’s FIFA soccer game. When I played a game in Montreal, the crowd just kept doing old soccer chants from the 1980s.

Lighthouse Hockey: Trying to reconstitute the Hogue-Turgeon-Thomas line from NHL 94.

by Dominik on Sep 7, 2010 6:25 PM EDT up reply actions  

I knew you’d love that.

Trevor Gillies: Giving an all new meaning to "Mustache Ride"
Contributor to Lighthouse Hockey not sure if I'm the Sniper or the Enforcer.

by Mark D on Sep 7, 2010 6:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

bwahahahahaha

Well, the RDP part made me sad, but the rest of that is funny as hell. He forgot a couple of features, however:

  • Dynamic commentary system: sign more than three European players and an animated Don Cherry claims that you’re ruining video hockey.
  • The Flyers have fourteen goalies on the opening roster, including Ray Emery, Mike Leighton, Ron Hextall, Bernie Parent, and G Backup.
  • Beginner mode – Glen Sather acts the way he does in real life.
  • Expert mode – Slats still acts the same way, but now he’s your boss.
  • Every August, Brian Burke tries to trade Tomas Kaberle, whether or not he’s on the Toronto Maple Leafs in your franchise mode.
  • Deepest franchise mode ever: argue about whether your fake players will participate in the Olympic simulation! Take 45 days to approve contracts! Run your team into the ground and get a lifetime job in the virtual studio with Brian Engblom and Darren Eliot!
  • New for this year, all AHL franchises are included, not just the Edmonton Oilers.
  • Ships with a free copy of the revised Collective Bargaining Agreement: the sections governing the SPC are amended to read, “Because Gary said so.”
  • Players can take part in the new Skills Competition – Hardest Shot, Fastest Skater, and Club Tomas Vokoun Like a Baby Seal.
  • Lifelike in-game promotional footage pretends that 1980-1983 never happened.

82 days into my latest contract approval process

by mikb on Sep 7, 2010 6:36 PM EDT up reply actions   2 recs

This is great!

I would actually consider buying this version.

/Note unceasing sarcastic laughter in background.
Fan of the 2010 Stanley Cup Champion Blackhawks!
Fan of the not 2010 Stanley Cup Champion Isles!

by burpchelischili on Sep 8, 2010 12:45 AM EDT up reply actions  

mikb ladies and gentlemen!

Love it.

Deepest franchise mode ever: argue about whether your fake players will participate in the Olympic simulation! Take 45 days to approve contracts! Run your team into the ground and get a lifetime job in the virtual studio with Brian Engblom and Darren Eliot!

Lighthouse Hockey: Trying to reconstitute the Hogue-Turgeon-Thomas line from NHL 94.

by Dominik on Sep 8, 2010 12:09 PM EDT up reply actions  

it's all the MST3K I watch

Downside – my wife HATES watching TV with me now. I need a 12-step program.

82 days into my latest contract approval process

by mikb on Sep 9, 2010 3:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

MST3K!

Do you have any Riff Tracks? My buddy puts them together for me so I don’t have to do the engineering. One day m’lady came home and could not figure out why I was: a) Watching “Independence Day,” nor b) falling off the couch laughing at “Independence Day.”

Lighthouse Hockey: Trying to reconstitute the Hogue-Turgeon-Thomas line from NHL 94.

by Dominik on Sep 9, 2010 8:37 PM EDT up reply actions  

ROWSDOWER!

Me and the Roomie are both MST3K fans. So I made her Battlefield Earth with Rifftrax. Unfortunately Battlefield Earth was so bad that she has no memory of ever watching it.

Trevor Gillies: Giving an all new meaning to "Mustache Ride"
Contributor to Lighthouse Hockey not sure if I'm the Sniper or the Enforcer.

by Mark D on Sep 10, 2010 11:50 AM EDT up reply actions  

I LOOOOOOVVVVVEEEEE that show!
I have every MST3K episode ever made on VHS!

Cant catch me! Cant catch me!

Let Us Go, Islanders! (Ever notice how strange that sounds without the contraction?)

by TheMetalChick on Sep 11, 2010 10:50 AM EDT up reply actions  

Id LOVE to see them but I thought it would be a pin to put them together with the movies.

Let Us Go, Islanders! (Ever notice how strange that sounds without the contraction?)

by TheMetalChick on Sep 11, 2010 10:51 AM EDT up reply actions  

I'll see if I have any good ones

Or if you know of any you’d like, I’ll see if I can get them. My friend always takes care of the painful work.

Lighthouse Hockey: Trying to reconstitute the Hogue-Turgeon-Thomas line from NHL 94.

by Dominik on Sep 14, 2010 12:53 PM EDT up reply actions  

Seriously????

Id love it- LOVE IT!
(Did I mention that Id love it?)

Let Us Go, Islanders! (Ever notice how strange that sounds without the contraction?)

by TheMetalChick on Sep 15, 2010 2:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

Not bad at all, but I wouldn't call them a playoff team.

I’m surprised carcillo went so high. I love him as a player, but is he really that high on the expansion board? The whole roster is spotty, but they aren’t as horrible as I thought they’d be. Some nice surprises in that list.

Go isles or Go home.

by OzzyFan on Sep 7, 2010 5:13 PM EDT reply actions  

Yep. Agreed across the board.

by HugoAgogo on Sep 7, 2010 6:15 PM EDT up reply actions  

The Islanders Young Ones

I completely missed The Young Ones reference when reading this earlier.

So Vyvyan = Trevor Gillies
Rick = Chris Campoli
Neil = Bruno Gervais
Mike = Frans Nielsen
The Balowskis = Garth Snow

Trevor Gillies: Giving an all new meaning to "Mustache Ride"
Contributor to Lighthouse Hockey not sure if I'm the Sniper or the Enforcer.

by Mark D on Sep 7, 2010 9:47 PM EDT reply actions  

Bahaha

(I forgot to link it when I originally posted it…then spent 20 minutes debating which clip to link.)

Excellent choices. My sister and I still quote Neil when the situation arises. I’m gonna go make a lentil now.

Lighthouse Hockey: Trying to reconstitute the Hogue-Turgeon-Thomas line from NHL 94.

by Dominik on Sep 8, 2010 12:12 PM EDT up reply actions  

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Josh Bailey 12 LW 10/2/1989 190 6-1
Rick DiPietro 39 G 9/19/1981 190 6-1
Mark Eaton 4 D 5/6/1977 215 6-1
Michael Grabner 40 RW 10/5/1987 185 6-0
Travis Hamonic 3 D 8/16/1990 203 6-2
Milan Jurcina 27 D 6/7/1983 253 6-4
Andrew MacDonald 47 D 9/7/1986 196 6-1
Matt Martin 17 LW 3/8/1989 210 6-3
Al Montoya 35 G 2/13/1985 203 6-2
Mike Mottau 10 D 3/19/1978 190 6-0
Matt Moulson 26 LW 11/1/1983 205 6-1
Evgeni Nabokov 20 G 7/25/1975 200 6-0
Aaron Ness 55 D 5/18/1990 170 5-10
Nino Niederreiter 25 RW 9/8/1992 205 6-2
Frans Nielsen 51 C 4/24/1984 184 6-0
Kyle Okposo 21 RW 4/16/1988 205 6-0
Jay Pandolfo 29 LW 12/27/1974 190 6-1
P.A. Parenteau 15 LW 3/24/1983 193 6-0
Marty Reasoner 16 C 2/26/1977 205 6-1
Dylan Reese 42 D 8/29/1984 201 6-1
Brian Rolston 11 LW 2/21/1973 215 6-2
Steve Staios 24 D 7/28/1973 200 6-1
Mark Streit 2 D 12/11/1977 197 6-0
John Tavares 91 C 9/20/1990 202 6-0
Tim Wallace 36 RW 8/6/1984 207 6-1
Ty Wishart 6 D 5/19/1988 222 6-4
Calvin de Haan 44 D 5/9/1991 187 6-1

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