This was not hockey, played by hockey players. This was some scrimmage between a learn-to-skate group and a team that actually needs points because it has some chance of going somewhere.

Game Summary | Event Summary | nhl.com Recap | Islanders Recap

Just a joke. An embarrassment. A virus better be ransacking this locker room right now, because otherwise there's no excuse for that. And Washington is up Saturday, with a return visit to Montreal on Monday. So ... yeah, something else would be nice.

Note: I'll add the video to this recap, if you really want the abuse, later when it's available. Video "highlights:"

Ways In Which This Game Challenged the Vocabulary for Variations of 'Fecal Folly'

• The Islanders were outshot 43-22, including 15-7 in the first. Oh, are shots important in this game?
  
• Martin Biron, though bombarded, was swimming in his crease and landing on his butt all night.
• No one except Kyle Okposo showed up. That's right, John Tavares had his first invisible night as an Islander.
• Okay, actually Matt Moulson showed up, too.
  
• Radek Martinek: Probably the next guy to sit in the scratch rotation. He's had a rough start and this was his roughest game.
• Mark Streit: A mostly sleepy, sometimes shaky night. Disappointing performance in his former home.
• Watching Marc-Andre Bergeron score on a powerplay bomb, then cripple Jack Hillen with another.

Ways in Which This Game Wasn't as Awful as, Say, A 9-0 Loss to Carolina

• Josh Bailey got a slump-buster goal -- a gift-wrapped empty net courtesy of Jaroslav Halak, who can be forgiven for sleepwalking.
• Martin Biron had that one awesome breakaway save on Scott Gomez ... after Radek Martinek handed the puck over.
• Hey, there was no first-period dominance to undercut with misery in the 2nd, nor any 3rd-period lead to blow.

Maybe they were sick. Maybe the back-to-back and travel got the best of them. But this schedule doesn't get any lighter. Despite the normal rebuilding caveats, we're going to need some progress here.